How My Toddler Learned to Say "I Am Sorry"

Just like any toddlers, my daughter is not perfect. I mean, she has her meltdowns, is sometimes mischievous and behaves like, well, like a 3-year old should do. But if there's one thing that I'm very proud of is that, at a very young age, even before she learned to say the word, she already knew how to say "sorry".

I can still remember, when she was one and a half year old, whenever I called her attention because she's not "listening" to what I'm telling her - of course, that would make my voice firm and a little louder than usual - she would immediately come to me then hug and kiss me. At that time I didn't know what she's doing or what she's up to. Eventually I realized it's her way of telling me she's sorry for whatever she might have done or for not listening to me. Soon she's able to talk and could "articulate" her feelings of regret. It melts my heart every time she does it.

So, how did she learn to say these 3 precious words? I am not claiming to be an expert in this matter but my experience has taught me that these "steps" (or whatever you may want to call them) really work for us.

Start early. It is never too early to teach our children the kind of values we want them to have.
As early as possible we should exert effort to inculcate in them the beliefs that hold true to us.

Teach by example. It is one thing to say it, doing it is entirely a different thing. Our actions speak volumes to our children more than the words they're hearing from us. As far as I can remember, I didn't tell my daughter at that age to say "I'm sorry" whenever she "offended" me or her dad. My thought at the time, "How will she understand it? Wait until she turns two." However, whenever I did something wrong (that would mean, I got mad at her for no reason or I had misjudged her actions), I was quick to say, "I'm sorry, baby. Mommy, didn't listen to what you're trying to tell her. I'm sorry. I won't do it again. I love you so much." Little did I realize that that left a deep impression in her heart- that there's nothing wrong with admitting you're wrong and it's okay to say you're sorry.

Sometimes the challenge with us adults, or parents for that matter is that, we're too "proud" to acknowledge our own mistakes. We think that because our children are "just kids" and we're the grown ups, we are always right. As a result, we don't say sorry to them and in turn, they won't as well.

Be a good model. Growing up, my siblings and I would say "I'm sorry" whenever we would offend anyone among us or even our parents. Why is that? Fortunately for us, my mother is a good role model. As a result, I have carried that "habit" until now. Being a couple, my husband and I are quick to admit our faults and say "sorry" to one another when we know that we've offended each other. We're unabashed to acknowledge our mistakes before each other and even in front of our daughter. And I believe that made a great impact to our daughter. Remember, in the eyes of a child: If daddy and mommy are doing it, then it must be right.

Commend the act. One of the things I do after our daughter say, "I'm sorry" is hug her. Since her primary love language is physical touch, mommy hugging her after she admits she's wrong makes her feel forgiven and loved. I believe that just like us adults, it takes a lot of courage for a child to confess she regrets the wrong she's done. So appreciating the act will encourage the child to bring out the same positive response when a situation calls for it.

I hope these simple steps help you as well in teaching your child/children say "I'm sorry" and other common courtesies. Can you think of other ways/steps? Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comment box below.

How My Daughter Potty-Trained Herself (That's How I'd Like to Think of It)!

I know most of you won't believe it. Some may even say that it's impossible, haha! But I'd like to believe that my daughter potty-trained herself. Here's a little bit of the story.

Barely 18 months old, our baby would always go to the bathroom door, point to the toilet bowl and say, "Mom, poop." or "Mom, weewee." So, was that it? No! The problem was, I wasn't ready yet to potty-train her. I thought she was too young to do it. I believed at that time, kids that age need to wait for at least another 6 months to be able to do it. What I did was (please don't follow this example), discourage her from using the toilet. Every time she would go to the bathroom door, take off her pants and diaper, I would always say, "Baby, you don't have to use that yet. You're still a baby. Let's wait until you're 2 years old, okay?" And she was like, "Mom, weewee." This went on for 2 to 3 weeks, then she stopped.

Finally the day I have been waiting for came; she celebrated her 2nd birthday. Two months after her birthday, I told her, "Baby, now is the time for you to use the potty." She stared at me and said, "No Mommy, baby pa (I'm still a baby). When I'm big girl. Baby use potty." My jaw dropped and I couldn't say anything. So I started looking for articles on how to potty train a toddler. Then it hit me. Potty training starts when the child, not the mommy or daddy, is ready. :(

A couple of months passed by and nothing happened to our potty-training. Six months after her birthday, we bought her a pink potty and several books about potty training (since she loves to read) but still this was what she would reply to my prodding, "No, mommy. When I'm big girl na."

Potty-training paraphernalias

My heart sank and I thought that she would never learn to use the potty. Or if she does learn, it would be too late or she might be too old (or at least 5 years old) by that time. I was so guilt-stricken; I would always tell myself, "I should have allowed her to use the toilet when she was younger. What have I done?" It came a point in time that I even prayed for it; that the Lord would make her ready to potty train (and I know the Lord answers prayers). :)

And then one day, in July, two months before she turns three this year, she told me, "Mommy, help baby take off pants and diaper please." I was like, "Why?" She said, "I no want wear diaper, Mommy. I want wear panty." I was like, "Really?" Of course my smile was from ear to ear! So I obliged and helped her wear her underwear. Then it happened. She got her potty, put it inside her bedroom and shouted, "Mommy, baby weewee, I use potty!" Then she sat on it. "Mommy, come here please." I said, "Hold on baby." Because I wanted to take a picture of her, haha! And then she asked me, "Hear that?" I said, "No." Then she asked me again, "Hear that?" Finally, I heard the tinkle! Yay!

So, how did my daughter exactly potty-train herself ? Well again, that's how I would like to think of it. :)

Because her Dad and I surrounded her with books about it, she kept reading them.
My daughter loves books, as in she really does! So we grabbed that advantage; I bought books (two books only); her Dad and I took turns in reading them to her while she kept reading her favorite. She specially likes Karen Katz' "A Potty for Me". She so likes that part "I'm so proud of me!" And I guessed at that time, part of her was wishing she could also say that one day. And she did!

Karen Katz Books

She read it everyday and every night.

She would do some "practice".
We do know that practice makes perfect, don't we? I just can't believe that at her age she already knows the principle! Last June, she told me, "Mommy, I no want diaper." I was like, "No, baby. You should wear it or else you'll wet your pants." My daughter said, "No, mommy. Baby wear panty." So, I took it as a sign that she was ready. But then of course, she wet her undies. And I reassuringly told her, "It's okay, baby. It happens. That means, you have to use your potty now. " She was like, "No, mommy, I wear white diaper (training pants/diaper) and baby get no wet." Then I helped her wear her white diaper. That was the scene every other day that month. It was what I call, "practice number 1".

"Practice number 2" is like this: every time she would feel like she wanted to pee, she would ask me to take off her underwear and then she would get her potty and sit on it. And because I so badly wanted to document it, instead of helping her, I would get my phone and prepare to take a picture. She would say, "Mommy, no picture please." Of course, I would listen and then hold her hands while singing to her so she could finally do it. Then she would say, "Ayo, mommy. No weewee." So, I would help her put on her undies back again. That went on and on for like 2 weeks.

It's one of those days (practice number 2) :)

The Day We Have Been Waiting For Finally Came

Then one day, as I have already mentioned above, last month - two months before she turns 3 years old this year, it happened. She sat on her potty and peed! Hooray! And I was right, she was looking forward to that day when she could say, "Mommy, Am proud of me!" I told her, "You did it, baby! I'm so proud of you!"

"Hear that?"

"Am so proud of me!" Yay!

From that day onwards, she has been using her potty to pee and poop. We are able to save on diapers; she would just use them when we're going out /traveling or when she goes to sleep at night. The nice thing is, even during nap time, she would insist not to wear diaper. At first I got worried that she might wet our bed so I told her that wouldn't work. But one afternoon, she begged me not to put on her a diaper even if she'd take a nap. I obliged but was kind of worried. You know what? She's right! She didn't pee while asleep but as soon as she woke up she told me, "Mommy, baby weewee. Go toilet, please."

Potty training, I believe, isn't about how good the parent/s is/are in training their kid/s. It's about the child in training. It's his/her readiness that really matters. As parents, we need to be as understanding, patient and supportive as we can be.

How about you? How did you potty train your kid/s? Am I right to think that my daughter potty-trained herself? I would love to hear your thoughts. :)

I Heart Being a Mom

Hello there! I'm back to blogging world after what seems like forever. I definitely miss writing. And though my hands are full right now (hubby is out of town for work), I know I need to right. What better way to start my blogging adventure again after a long hiatus than to write a topic that is very close to my heart... Being a mom. So, here I go!

Last month, I shared with you why I love being a mommy. I gave my top three reasons why it's great to be a mom. Also, I mentioned about an event that would allow me and other mommy bloggers to meet up with expectant moms of Nazareth Home. Three days ago, I was privileged and blessed to be a part of this gathering. 

It was conceptualized and organized by JLo, a mommy blogger herself. It was a pre- Mother's Day Celebration cum baby shower for the new moms and moms to be under the care of Kaisahang Buhay Foundation. KBF is a non-government organization that offers different programs and services for the welfare and development of expectant single moms and their children. Aside from providing the basic needs of these moms (like shelter and medical necessities), KBF also meets their emotional and spiritual needs by rendering counseling.

Food, Give-away, Donation, Etc.

I was happy to be able to meet great people and adorable babies. I would say that everything (food, give-away, donation, program) and what transpired that afternoon were good. Two special people (mother and son) though tugged at my heart, made me cry and gave me these insights.

It matters not whether it's your first or eighth baby; a mother is always a new mom when a new baby comes.
 
Mommy H is not a first time mom. She has already 7 children from a previous marriage.She entrusted them to her mother's care back in the province so she could work in Manila and provide for them. Then it happened. She got pregnant by another man and although the man was man enough to take full responsibility for what had happened, she couldn't agree with him to live with him and "leave" her 7 children. More than a week ago, she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. And just like every "new mom", she wants the best for her baby; has big dreams for her little man and wanting to give him the best that she could give.

A baby is always a blessing.

I believe that babies are like mornings. They are God's way of telling us that He has not given up on us (mankind) yet. Therefore I say, a baby is always a blessing, no matter what. The newborn babies were the first one to greet me when I entered the door of Nazareth Home. My heart melted as I looked at them. So precious. Then I got to meet and hold the little man of Mommy H. He is so handsome! As much as Mommy H loves him, sadly she cannot keep him. She has lots of "what ifs" in her mind. However, she is thinking of entrusting him to someone or a couple who will be able to provide for her little man. With this thought she is also hoping that one day she will see him again. As I listened to her, my tears just welled up in my eyes and began to trickle down my cheeks. I could feel the pain inside. Looking at her baby I felt like he was my own and couldn't bear the fact that he'd be taken away from her. All I could say at that time was, "You know, baby ____ is a blessing to you. Let's ask the Lord to show you what His perfect will for you and baby ___. I know He only wants the best for both of you."

Adorable Babies

One can always extend a helping hand.

Although I brought some "gifts" for the "girls" of Nazareth Home, at that time I felt like those were not enough. More than the material blessings, I believe they also need emotional support and spiritual guidance. Before I said goodbye to Mommy H and her little man, I offered to pray for them. I knew it was the best gift that I could give them. I also assured her that I would be praying for her and the baby even after that event.

When I came home I told my husband about the event and my one-on-one moment with Mommy H. I expressed my desire to go back to Nazareth Home and give whatever we could to Mommy H and her little man. I'm so blessed to have a husband who does not only believe in me but supports me. One of these days I'll go back to Nazareth Home together with my husband and our baby.

I Heart Being a Mom event was a new and first one for me. I am so thankful that I had been chosen to be one of the mommy bloggers to witness (and blog) it. Thank you JLo for making this possible. Heartfelt gratitude also goes to those who helped and supported this event.

Sisters' Sweetness

M Catering & Fine Foods
Party Boosters
King Sue Ham
KidiKraft
Tickled Moms
Digital Filipino

Mommy Bloggers together with Ms. Mae (Resource Speaker)

I hope that this is not the last. I am looking forward to seeing (and being a part) of more cause-oriented and blog worthy events.

Why I Love Being a Mom

I am a fan of beauty pageants. Ever since we had a television set, I together with my Ate would always watch beauty contests (international or local) on TV. One of the Ms. Universe pageants that I have seen was in May 1994. The most coveted beauty title and crown was given to Sushmita Sen. Does anyone of you still remember her? I have never forgotten the question put to her: "What is the essence of a woman?" I believe she gave a most poignant answer. She replied: "Just being a woman is God's gift". The origin of a child is a mother, a woman. She shows a man what sharing, caring, and loving is all about. That is the essence of a woman." 

As I have understood it, the essence of a woman is being a mom. Being able to carry life in your womb, protect that life and give birth to a tiny (not to mention cute) living creature that will change your life because at that moment when you see her/him and hold her/him in your arms, suddenly love, care and sacrifice have new meanings. That was what I felt when I brought forth my daughter into this world. It was a special and beautiful birth. And I know that she is mine and I am hers.

Being a mom is not just having a kid or kids in tow. As I have always said, it's not an easy job; it's hard work. But as someone said, you don't consider a job work if you love what you're doing. So, you don't consider mommy-ing a work if you love doing it. Well, I love doing it. Although sometimes, as a human being, I still need to take a break just so to keep me sane (You can read here how I stay sane as SAHM). So, if it's not easy why do I still love being a mom? Here are my reasons:

Being a mom is a miracle.
I don't know if you have read my post on breastfeeding. I mentioned there that I didn't get to be a mom right away after the wedding. I had two miscarriages and my third pregnancy was not without prayers and tears before it happened. So when the day finally arrived that the Lord remembered His promise to me, my husband and I were in tears. We treasured every single day of our pregnancy journey because we knew it was a miracle.

Maternity Photo by Great Image

The other night, right after our dinner, I looked at some of my stuff and saw one of my preggy pictures (photo above). Our baby saw it and began asking questions. One of the questions was, "Baby, mommy (where's baby, mommy)?" "You're inside mommy's tummy, baby.", I replied. Then she looked at it again and looked at me. She said, "Ahh, mommy? Amazing!" And I believe she is right, being able to carry a baby inside of you, that is, being a mom is indeed amazing.<3

Being a mom is a privilege.
I always hear our church pastor say this, "Hindi po lahat ng babae ay mabibigyan ng pagkakataon or pribilehiyo na mag luwal at mag aruga ng sanggol. (Not all women are given a chance and privilege to give birth and take care of a baby). I agree with him. For me, when I was told by my ob-gyne that I was indeed pregnant, aside from feeling so ecstatic about it, I felt so honored and privileged to be chosen as the bearer of this wonderful baby. It's not because she is someone special or great. It's just the thought of carrying a child in my womb. What an honor! <3

Being a mom is a blessing.
From the olden even biblical times, it was always thought that married women were considered blessed if they were able to bear a child and give birth even to just one. Remember, Sarah (the mother of all nations), Rebekah (the mother of Jacob and Esau), Rachel (the mother of Joseph and Benjamin), Hannah (the mother of Samuel) and Elizabeth (the mother of John the Baptist)? All of them had been barren and then eventually blessed with children.

Simple baby shower given by office mates

Gifts for my little fashionista

I consider myself blessed because I am a mom to our little fashionista. In fact, I feel like I have never been blessed before the way I am being blessed now. From the time of conception until today, everything has been faithfully provided to us and to our little one. But more than the material and financial blessings, it's the blessing that you can't see or touch but you can feel. It's the unexplainable sensation you perceive inside. That kind of blessing cannot be compared or even paid. <3

Smart Parenting Baby Shower

Bringing home some freebies

My loots from Pregnant Pause sponsored by Mommy Mundo

Felt so blessed to be bringing all these stuff home

On May 7th, a group of mommy bloggers will gather together to meet and support the expectant mothers of Nazareth Homes. We are enjoining everyone specially mothers out there to promote and endorse this cause. If you are interested to be one of the event sponsors, please contact Jennifer Lopez Gana for more details. Thank you so much and I hope to see you there. <3